When is a Time to Hate and a Time to Love?

“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.” -Ecclesiastes 3:1, 8 NIV

I thought it was a mistake when I reaquote-i-hate-you-i-love-you.jpgd it for the first time. In the Bible I wasn’t expecting to read something that induces us to hate. Isn’t God commanding us to love our neighbor? The Lord has wonderful ways to teach us.

There was a period in my life when I battled between hate and love. I felt was I was drifting away from God because my heart was darkened and poisoned by hatred that I thought has vanished but I just unknowingly hid and by slightest trigger it was provoked. I let the evil win again, I thought and disheartened. I wasn’t doing what I’ve written. I had always followed my heart full of filth. Then I began to realize that this is really me, flawed, weak and imperfect, just like all of us. This is who we are. We’re not hypocrites. We are human with real emotions and struggles.

Hate is a natural human emotion.

If I would list down all things I dislike I would write a 500-pages book. I detest people who look down on others and treat them unequally based on physical traits and financial status. I hate those who regard themselves as highly superior and others are unimportant. I don’t like those who befriend others just for the benefit they can gain. I loathe narcissistic who often babble about themselves and cut off others while they’re speaking because they aren’t interested. I hate being compared. I hate being talked about behind my back and keep their mouth shut when in front of me. I hate gossips and rumors about me spreading by someone I’ve trusted but doesn’t understand my feelings or unwillingly tried to understand. I hate being judged. I abhor those who also abhor me. I detest those who hate the ones I adore. I hate those who are overly concerned about their image and what others think of them. There’s more to life than conforming to the world’s standard. I loathe those who can’t appreciate small things. Gratefulness is the key to contentment. I despise those who are insensitive to others’ feelings, so full of themselves, arrogant and self-centered.

Everyone hates being treated badly and unfairly and so do I. We aren’t robot that if a person disrespects or humiliates us we will not be angered. If a person threw stones at you that caused your head to bleed, our first reaction is not to laud that person. Our first idea is to get even. We wish to throw larger stones so his or her head will crack and bleed even more and feel the excruciating pain that we’re feeling. We long for justice. We want to treat him or her the way he or she treats us or much worse. We want vengeance. Even an animal has a natural reaction to fight back when threatened. How arduous for us to offer also the other cheek when they slapped us on the right cheek! We tend to turn away from the ones who hurt us and rage and hurt aren’t like little flames that can be extinguished right away. How can we kill a tornado inside of us? How can we stop the blazing aversion caused by the agonizing pain they inflicted on us?

Do you know that the Lord also hates? He also wants justice. God doesn’t tolerate evil. He has mercy on abandoned children, rape victims, the orphan, the oppressed and the poor. God abhors sin and wickedness.

“There are six things the Lord hates, seven that are detestable to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked schemes, feet that are quick to rush into evil, a false witness who pours out lies and a person who stirs up conflict in the community.” -Proverbs 6:16-19

He knows our hearts and understand our pain and brokenness because He also hates evil things of the world. We loathe depravity as well as He does.

“For you are not a God who delights in wickedness; evil may not dwell with you. The boastful shall not stand before your eyes; you hate all evildoers. You destroy those who speak lies; the Lord abhors the bloodthirsty and deceitful man.” -Psalm 5:4-6 ESV

God Is Just

So if God hates depravity then why does He allow injustice, crime, inequity and corruption to happen? If He has mercy on us then why does He permit all kinds of evil things to exist? Many are turning their back out of confusion, bitterness, apathy and disinterest. Many people are questioning God’s existence because they can’t see and feel Him. If they only knew and understood God’s promises to us, they could find comfort and refuge in Him amidst sorrow and misery. God will punish the wicked in due time. The Lord will repay.

Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. -Romans 12:19 NIV

God has given us freedom to make choices and He will judge us in the final judgment based on those choices that we made.

But because you are stubborn and refuse to turn from your sin, you are storing up terrible punishment for yourself. For a day of anger is coming, when God’s righteous judgment will be revealed.” -Romans 2:5 NLT

But do you know that God is a God of second chances, third chances, fourth chances and many chances? Many are anticipating the coming of the Lord but He is patient and forgiving. He’s waiting for us to change and to become a person that He wants us to be. He’s waiting for us to find Him because we belong to God. He hates sin but He doesn’t hate us. God loves humanity.

When is a Time to Love?

If our decisions, actions and motives are affected by the hate that occupies our heart, we become a slave of it. We can become a slave of our dark emotions and the only way to be free from it is to forgive, to understand, empathize, to ignore our own hurt which opens door for acceptance of each other’s flaws and mistakes, to get rid of pride and to humbly admit our own shortcomings, to be selfless, to love.

It is always easier said than done. How can we forgive others that aren’t sorry? How can we empathize for those who aren’t empathetic as well but cruel? How can we understand others when we also long to be understood? How can we ignore our own hurt when it is disabling us? How can we be selfless when it seems that nobody cares enough but our own self? How can we love when we don’t feel loved? Thus, we nurture that hate. We harden our hearts with such rage and bitterness. It may take time. We can shed tears night and day or plot a massive revenge but in the end of the day, does it make us really happy and content?

I will be truly jubilant when I start to let go of all the negative emotions and let God take over. I know, Lord, I’m imperfect so teach me how to accept other’s imperfections. I am not a good person but He always forgives me every time I ask for His forgiveness, then why can’t I forgive other people who have hurt me? I’ve always hurt Him by constantly committing sins but His mercy and grace never cease. His love is so great that even a murderer, a rapist, a thief or an adulterer will repent and ask for forgiveness, they will surely be forgiven. He loves everyone including those who aren’t deserving like how He let the rain pour and sun rise on all kinds of people.

“But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.” – Matthew 5:44-45 NIV

So when is a time to love? As soon as we remember that God first loved us even though we are unloving. He suffered and died in cross for the sake of our eternal life. “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” -Romans 5:8 NIV.

“We love because He first loved us. Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen. And he has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister.” -1 John 4:19-21 NIV

I love you not because you deserve my love but because God loves me even though I don’t deserve to be loved.


6 thoughts on “When is a Time to Hate and a Time to Love?

    1. I know, I know. Tao lang tayo. Madaling sabihin pero mahirap gawin. Base sa experience ko, ang hirap talaga pero habang inaalagaan ko yung galit ko sa puso ko lalong bumibigat. Nasisira ang araw ko, tumatanda ako ng mabilis, lols. Then time heals all wounds. I start to think of all the good things God has given me. Malay ko baka may pinagdaraanan pala siya kaya niya nagawa yun o baka ginugulpi siya ng parents niya nun bata siya. lols. Mahirap talaga mahalin ang nakakainis pero oras na nagawa natin nakakaluwag ng puso. Parang nawala yung mabigat na nakadagan. 😉 Ang haba ng reply ko lols

      1. ha ha ha ha natawa ako dun sa baka ginugulpi sya nung bata sya…well…magaan talaga sa pakiramdam pag nawala na ang inis…pero it takes time ha ha love takes time LOL

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