Blogged on November 13, 2012

I’m practicing on the spot blogging right now. It’s a kind of writing you don’t take too much time organizing your thoughts. You write what pops out on your mind at this very moment. It saves time and effort since I have such a little time to devote to editing and probing. So today is my birthday. I’m doing this because I have nothing to do now. I stay at home to contemplate a year added to my age and it freaks me out a bit. I’m not thinking of publishing this entry right away. I wanna gather greetings from some rare people dear to me who remembered my day. I don’t like the idea of Facebook that makes you remember someone’s birthday because you cannot remember it yourself. Now is the time I can figure out certain people who really remember, thoughtful as a chocolate, and those people who don’t give a single fuss about me. Uh, maybe they give a damn about me but not enough to remember the day I was born. As I often say, quantity of friends doesn’t matter to me but quality of friends is what counts the most. Except from my family–parent, siblings, nephew and nieces who personally greeted me, there is this particular pal who greeted despite the fact that we didn’t see each other for quite 11 years. She was my classmate in grade school, we didn’t talk for a long long time and I am astonished to see her message flashed on my computer.

Advance because she greeted two days before my actual day. She keeps doing it every year and what really amazed me is that she is one of the people I least expect to greet on my birthday. I am not really that sensitive kind of individual but isn’t it really heartwarming to know that some people you consider friends truly remember the very first day you discern the world? It is, it is indeed. On the contrary, isn’t it heartbreaking to know that some people you thought could remember didn’t remember at all?Β I decided to accumulate all the greetings I received today from few people who really remember even though Facebook didn’t remind them like shit. There is a pal and a cousin who greeted through SMS but I couldn’t put their messages here.

I don’t know if I should feel betrayed that some persons close to me didn’t remember at all. We talked over the phone for a long time but all she blabbered was about her personal concerns. I couldn’t help thinking that perhaps if she didn’t need to inquire about her health she didn’t bother to call me up. There was also a friend who chatted me only to ask why I was absent while the other one just explained something to me. They didn’t know neither remember and it felt like I lose some of my good friends. I don’t know why this depresses me now when I didn’t give a shit before. I hate celebrating my natal day. I am not used to celebrating my own. Perhaps because I’m getting damn old and I’m starting to have a notion that my days are numbered and I become more maudlin than usual and all of a sudden even simple birthday greetings from JobStreet and JobsDB put a smile on my face.

Buti pa sila, unlike certain people who you thought know you enough but in reality, just know very little about you. Uh, perhaps it can be that they just care less than you expected. Anyway, who cares. Happy birthday to me. I wish eternal life and happiness.

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